Tuesday, December 06, 2005
A Bite From Tesco Would Mean The End Of My Sanity.
The biggest supermarket chain in the UK, Tesco, have successfully ensured that I, having never bought one of their sandwiches in my life, will continue to never buy one of their sandwiches.
They may be delicious for all I know, but I will never find out - in case it plays Jingle Effing Bells when I open the plastic packaging, or Santa Bloody Claus Is Coming To Town.
We are assaulted everywhere we go with canned music, whether it be in the lift, in shops, the pub, on the telephone, all year round. Bad enough, but from the beginning of November onwards we are subjected to something even worse. Christmas canned music.
Now Tesco have announced the ultimate in canned sickness, the musical sandwich which surely, if I was ever daft enough to buy one, would drive me right over the edge.
If, however, they sold a nice triple decker which didn't include turkey and screamed Bah Humbug at the top of it's electronic voice when I opened the wrapping, I might be persuaded.
They may be delicious for all I know, but I will never find out - in case it plays Jingle Effing Bells when I open the plastic packaging, or Santa Bloody Claus Is Coming To Town.
We are assaulted everywhere we go with canned music, whether it be in the lift, in shops, the pub, on the telephone, all year round. Bad enough, but from the beginning of November onwards we are subjected to something even worse. Christmas canned music.
Now Tesco have announced the ultimate in canned sickness, the musical sandwich which surely, if I was ever daft enough to buy one, would drive me right over the edge.
If, however, they sold a nice triple decker which didn't include turkey and screamed Bah Humbug at the top of it's electronic voice when I opened the wrapping, I might be persuaded.
© Colcam 2005-2007
