Sunday, October 28, 2007
But The Bike Consented, M'Lud.
Why, I would like to know, was a man who had sex with a bicycle hauled up in front of a court in Ayr, Scotland, and put on the sex offenders' register?
Did the bike complain, say no or scream rape - or was it an underaged bike, groomed on the internet and lured to the man's room?
More importantly, I would like to know HOW one has sex with a bike of the two-wheeled variety and, while on the subject, may I enquire about the methods employed in having sex with a pavement which, by all accounts, has also brought the wrath of the law courts down on poor Karl Watkins who was caught in the act in Redditch in 1993. He, apparently, was jailed for his amorous advances but that was obviously in a public place, where most willing pavements are.
Robert Stewart and his bike were not in a public place, but behind a locked door in Ayr, and as the bike in question presumably did not give evidence against him at the trial, it's hard to see where the offence lies.
I don't own a bicycle, and so far have never been aroused at the sight of one, no matter how pretty, but I'm still curious...
It's not mentioned in the Kama Sutra, and there's nothing about pavements in there either.
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Did the bike complain, say no or scream rape - or was it an underaged bike, groomed on the internet and lured to the man's room?
More importantly, I would like to know HOW one has sex with a bike of the two-wheeled variety and, while on the subject, may I enquire about the methods employed in having sex with a pavement which, by all accounts, has also brought the wrath of the law courts down on poor Karl Watkins who was caught in the act in Redditch in 1993. He, apparently, was jailed for his amorous advances but that was obviously in a public place, where most willing pavements are.
Robert Stewart and his bike were not in a public place, but behind a locked door in Ayr, and as the bike in question presumably did not give evidence against him at the trial, it's hard to see where the offence lies.
I don't own a bicycle, and so far have never been aroused at the sight of one, no matter how pretty, but I'm still curious...
It's not mentioned in the Kama Sutra, and there's nothing about pavements in there either.
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Labels: Crime, People, Scotland
© Colcam 2005-2007
